- Today's suggested practice: Day 1 of this month's practice... (see below)
- My playlist while writing today's meditation: Miles Davis, On Green Dolphin Streethttps://music.apple.com/ca/album/on-green-dolphin-street/942991756?i=942991830
- My morning practice: 30 minutes of meditative practice, including Infinite Trust pranayama and meditation
- My vulnerability practice: Looking into her eyes my heart aches, and I wonder, Where does this river take me today?
—Hans Peter Meyer
There is a river, flowing through each of our lives, our bodies. For the men who started their journey of a thousand days with me four days ago, the river should be pulling at your roots right now.... Take heart: as you do this month’s challenging practice, a practice that will deepen your roots, feel the tug of this river drawing you towards unknown turbulence and beauty. Feel into this flow. Feel this —and hold onto yourselves. You are already and always this strong.
For those who are not yet ready for that particular journey, please, take a few moments with today's practice and become acquainted with the never-ending flow that moves through your body.
So often I've resisted this flow. Determined to follow my own path, wading and striving against the flow...
There was that moment when I understood something. I was in San Francisco. I'd just spent three days in a John Wineland "Art of Fearless Intimacy" coed workshop. At the same time, I was in the middle of a 40-day sadhana based on Sikh teachings. And, at the same time, over half way through my Kundalini Yoga teacher training. A lot of flow! Big rivers moving through me. And in the midst of these powerful currents the question of which path to take burst upon me: What path do I choose?
Do I persist in resisting the flow, do I persist in my willful path, what was becoming clear as the path of my karma? Do I keep beating my head against the wall of my ego and its struggle with the world? Or am I finally ready to surrender to my dharma, the way of following a teacher, the way of service? This way was opening to me. I could feel it. And it would be so easy. To surrender.
And so, there in that San Francisco airport cubicle I wept. Writing my way through the flood of feelings and experiences I was going through, the tears wetting the page before me, the question was resolved: I was ready to follow a teacher. I was ready, after much resistance, to accept the journey of a thousand days that has brought me here.
Relief! I followed Wineland. I signed up for the next coed intensive, three weeks away in New York City: The Art of Fierce Intimacy. I took every coed workshop and every monthly online meeting and the first of his men's online programs... But this chip on my shoulder... My relationships with teachers are fraught with tension as I swim hard against the river keeping this chip, my ego, high and dry.
It is good to remember this today, in this silence. This solitude. And then to be given a beautiful reminder by this teacher, of what is most important in my life today: to know that my beloved is the one whose powerful, often silent and solitary flow shows me my way to my experience of love, of the divine.
TODAY’S INSPIRATIONS 🌀When you surrender your self (ego), your personal will, to the will of God (Spirit, Universe, Life) then there no longer are any egoistic motives for you to act upon, you don’t get lost anymore in the complicated maze created by the psychological mind with it’s schemes. Your way becomes clear.
You serve the bigger whole, seeing all as the Divine (the way of the Sage). (Tim and Marieke, Kundalini Yoga School, Infinite Trust sadhana, Day 34)
🌀Vibrate the Cosmos. The Cosmos shall clear the path. (Aquarian Sutra 5)
🌀…beyond your needs is the place in you that is needless, full, infinite and complete.
Find someone who takes you there and hold on for dear life. (John Wineland)
🌀 You're not like that now. (My beloved, my Oracle)
TODAY'S SUGGESTED PRACTICEDay 1 of this month's practice, seven minutes to ask, Where is the flow? And how am I allowing or resisting?
Please read through first, then ...
- Today, sit (or stand) in stillness with this question....
- Set your timer for seven minutes and close your eyes.
- As with last month, if you are feminine-identified, please sit or lie down to allow your body to be a still container for the river that flows through you. If you are masculine-identified, consider standing, consider feeling the tension in your body as you hold space for yourself as the river moves through you.
- Begin by closing your eyes and aligning your body into its truest, most elegant posture, tucking your chin to lift your heart, tilting your pelvis to straighten your spine. Become still, more still than you've ever been.
- The only movement at this point is your breath, moving slowly through your nose and down through your softened throat. Feel the "almost-snoring" of your breath as it passes into your body, filling your belly, your heart. Let this full belly and heart press down into your pelvis. Sitting or standing, lift out of your pelvis, letting your pelvis and legs become heavy, dropping into the earth below. If you are laying down, let the weight of your hips and shoulders be held by earth's gravity. Relaxed, yet fully aware of your body...
- Only breathing and only attending to your breath .... then allow yourself to feel this breath as a tidal current, ebbing and flowing through your body.... becoming slower and deeper, opening this body to feel even more. Today, feel into where this flow meets other flows of energy —thoughts, feelings, sensations, pains, pleasures, anything at all that is more than simply breathing. Notice how easily these currents move together... Notice where there is turbulence, distraction, irritation, upset, resistance... Just notice. Don't do anything with what you observe. Just notice. And breathe, your breath the deep current you can rely on, the regular and stable rhythm that you can gently hold onto as you feel everything, perhaps even enjoying everything, from this stable place that is itself always changing but is always with you... This is your body teaching you who you are, how deep you are, how much you can enjoy the flows of life. Hold this space of your awareness. Breathe, and hold, gently, with love. Allow it all to transform, as it needs to...
- As the timer signals the end of these seven minutes allow your eyes to slowly open. Take three, relaxed breath cycles and see yourself sitting or standing or lying still in this space you are in. Allow yourself to know this: no matter what the currents that pull at you, you are deeper and more still, able to choose to open and be nourished by all that comes to you, flows through you. Then, step into your day or evening, confident and powerful.✨ Retreats for Men 2022-2023