- Coming up Feb 1: Men’s conversation with LeRoy Gordon, February 1 sacredbodies.ca/events
- Coming up Feb 18: “Sacred Sexuality for Couples,” with Fabiola Perez http://fabiolaperez.com/offerings
- Today’s question: Are you feeling the great, overwhelming unreasonableness that is the divine feminine in your life? Are you willing to let Her be wild and unruly, to show you the way to your deeper, truer self?
- Today's suggested practice: Day 26, the last day of this month's practice with Sarah Anderson (see video, below)
- My playlist while writing today's meditation: Beyoncé, If I Were a Boy (I swear I’d be a better man) https://music.apple.com/ca/album/if-i-were-a-boy/295783816?i=295783978
- Practice: 7am: 60 minutes of yogic practice, including Meditation for Purifying the Elements
- My vulnerability practice: Remembering that feeling of loss, the grief, my regret, and allowing it to make me a better man, a truer version of the man I am…
Hans Peter Meyer
What is “Sacred Sexuality for Couples,” a conversation with Fabiola Perez (forward 2-3 minutes past my opening to hear Fabiola)https://www.instagram.com/tv/CoEDWPXP6Zq/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Listen? What do you hear?
Is it quiet enough to really hear beyond the noise of your own wants? What depths will this dark silence show you? Listen.
I listened last night as my colleague, Fabiola Perez, spoke about the sacred relationship we can have with this life, with this world, with the ones we love. This was a public conversation, on Instagram (listen to the video link above). Many women chose to join. But where, my brothers, where were you?
This is our place: to listen to the oracles and sirens who will take us to the threshold of what we know, and show us that we are so much more. If we only trust ourselves to cross the threshold. To lead by following the follow…
But I get it. It’s unreasonable. It’s beyond the logic we’ve been trained so well to follow, that very masculine and very disenchanted way of understanding the world. But let me tell you, from the benefit of my four decades plus as an adult male in this culture: the nourishment I need, what I need to become the man I love, the man I admire, the man who is most trustworthy, the man who has it all…. To be that man I need to surrender to the oracle, the siren. To listen to the unreasonable knowing and allow myself to be called over the threshold into Her darkness, and there to find the treasure I don’t even know I seek.
But let’s return to the topic of “sacred sexuality for couples” (which is, of course, over the threshold of our knowing; certainly over the threshold of my knowing those painful years ago). Most of us who identify as masculine-identified men, we are shy of these deeper explorations of what this darkness called “sex” might be. Some of us may be comfortable with the kind of sexuality that relates directly to our erections and our craving for ejaculation, and with tits & ass & pussy along the way. I know. I know because I was. And I wasn’t a lousy lover. But I was a lazy lover.
What changed? “When I [lost] the one I wanted…”
Sometimes it’s only the pain that helps me to learn what I need to learn. Pain. And letting it sink it as regret. And choosing to not suffer through this again and again but to feel the pain and learn.
Losing my beloved. In the chaos of my righteous activity in the world I wasn’t paying attention. Such a familiar trope: A man has the woman of his dreams only to lose her as he becomes distracted with other dreams… What was he dreaming of in the first place? Having more and more and more? Because “more” satisfied? Perhaps…
In my case I was not paying attention. I was distracted by the “more.” I did not listen when she, in her soft & quiet way, asked me to lead her into the unknown of our sacred marriage. Or, what might have become our sacred marriage…
I did not listen, and she was lost to me. How painful it was for her, this opening and inviting and offering all that she had to give…. And then, to be taken for granted… This is how I stay open in the face of endless testing by the divine feminine in this life: to remember how she hurt, how my inattention caused that suffering…
And this is why I do this work: to feel this pain, that I won’t suffer, that I won’t be the source of her suffering. To be willing to feel the pain of this leadership —stepping over the threshold into the dark and frightening unknown— the leadership she yearns for. That I may be released from the suffering that comes from staying, forever, at the threshold.
Again with the tango lessons: I lead by following the follow.
I follow as she calls me deeper.
She knows, without reasonable knowing, where I am to lead. Her heart shows the way. And today, now, in this moment, I pay attention. With unreasonable knowing, I step over the threshold, my heart open to the treasure I do not know I seek.
🌀You deserve nothing. (Kendra Cunov)
🌀Men… encourage her to remain untamed. …allow her love to wake the parts of you that are afraid to feel, that are not strong enough to hold her fullness, and that need her to remain unthreatening and pleasing in order to feel secure in your masculinity. (Jeremie Lotemo @byermeas on Insta)
🌀And you, you see me. You hear me. You know me. (My beloved, my Oracle, my Siren)
TODAY'S SUGGESTED PRACTICE
Day 26 of this month's practice, the last day of this “sacred womb” practice. Please take six minutes today to sit and join Sarah Anderson in a beautiful “Sacred Womb” meditation (because all of us, however we identify, can benefit from some loving attention to our “feminine” creative/generative capacities)
Please read through first, then ...
- Today, sit (or stand) in stillness as you listen to your heart, your belly, your sex, your root and let this question stir within you…. Are you feeling the great, overwhelming unreasonableness that is the divine feminine in your life? Are you willing to let Her be wild and unruly, to show you the way to your deeper, truer self? Again, this is the question posed to the sacred womb, the fecund darkness that lies beyond our knowing. Let that divine mystery of creation reveal Herself, no matter how masculine you are, no matter how little you may trust this feminine mystery…
- Set your timer for 6 minutes or listen to or watch Sarah:
- As the timer signals or the video ends allow your eyes to slowly open. Take three, relaxed breath cycles, no pressing, no effort, and feel yourself full, without thoughts, open. Safe to receive. Then, step into your day, letting the mantra echo as a nourishing vibration whenever you become still. You don't need to DO anything. Let the world come to you with its demands, its complaints, and yes, its endless tide of gifts and blessings.
***Yoga for Lovers, Tango for Lovers, two new offerings for Valentine’s date nights, and beyond. FMI see sacredbodies.ca/events